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REFLECTING UPON THE PAST
Ah, another year. Another year to evaluate our past and look toward our future. Some of us may look at the future with trepidation and others with hope.
Some of us may look at our past and know that it can only get better. I want to share a poem with you that I wrote recently. It goes like this: |
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I reflect upon my life’s history
Mouthing the same words
As in years past, “Nobody knows.”
Like the old Negro spiritual
That lives eternal
“Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen.”
No one can fathom
The unique hand
Life has dealt me
The deck laced with jokers
And exclusive clubs
And shovels heaping up dirt
To hide the royalty and aces
That are my due.
When I utter the song
Mixed with self-pity and self-loathing
I realize my due
Is no longer royalty,
But the backlash of my own choice
To label myself a loser.
Oh yes, I have a poker face
No one can see the conflict
Between my God gift
And the curse of negative pre-God thoughts.
My truth lies within the framework of
The pictures God has envisioned for me.
My lie, within the framework of my own
Limited, disapproving self-portrait.
As if I were Picasso,
As if I could paint a truer picture than God.
As if I could hide the ultimate result of my hand
From the one who creates and controls the hand.
Nobody knows
The trouble I’ve seen
And I hold on to that like a beggar
Holding onto the winning lottery ticket.
So I cry out, “Help me to fold them!”
Help me to move on from this table of defeatist attitudes
And into the royalty that God bestowed upon me
Long before anyone knew
The trouble I would see….
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2006 is the year to stop the lie. God does not condemn you. God does not loathe you. God does not want to destroy you. 2006 is the year of Truth.
God loves you. God wants to prosper you. Jesus came that you might have life and have it abundantly (John 10:10). 2006, live in the Truth of who you are this year. |
| Rev. Denise Cordova is pastor of Light of the Soul Christian Ministries, which meets every Sunday @ 7:00 PM in Reno, NV. Denise is a Jesus activist in the gltb community and is proud to proclaim God’s love for all people. You may contact her at liteofthesoul@aol.com or (775) 323-2798. |
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Progressive, contemporary services held Sundays at 7:00 PM
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